Friday, September 12, 2008

Middle School: Asylum for the Educationally Insane


I am substituting at Middle School today. For those that care, I have been subbing in the pursuit of classroom experience. I have made many observations regarding children and our educational system, however none have been as true or poignant as this: Middle School kids are singly responsible for deforestation. Forget the propagandized myths of logging and pollution, when you have watched a child tear out twenty pages of paper simply to ball them up and practice their fadeaway jumper into the trash bin you realize certain things.

1. Kids are often bored in school

2. Middle Schoolers major in annoying other people, adult or otherwise;

eventually they begin to annoy themselves and turn inward (ages 12-14)

3. It is possible that they are simply practicing for the big basketball

games in their future (read with a sarcastic tone)

4. It takes a special person to choose to teach middle school. Kids are even more

insane than I remember and I don't think I am special enough...

5. The Middle School I am at today has caused the massacre of some thirty thousand

trees, and it is only lunchtime!

Recyclers unite!!! Forge ahead to your local middle school! Practice your shotblocking!!

Or just get used to the sound of crinkling paper and the massive piles of paper balls

clotting our roadways in the near future. Does Micheline make an all-terrain paper tire??

3 comments:

Luis and Christy said...

Middle school is scarier to me than most high-security facilities b/c these kids often have the excuse-making parents who can justify any crap their kids do. I say, keep me in Kindergarten or let me retire. Any grade beyond kinder is too close to middle school!

cheyney webb said...

I hated being in Middle School. I remember plotting everyday to make it to 4th period and then call my mom saying I was sick. Ryan and I have decided to send our kids to boarding school or boot camp between ages 12-14.

Luis and Christy said...

Ridge -- those were the BEST comments EVER! I shared them with my TA because you better believe we've been talking about that ungrateful cow today!